Have you ever looked at your partner and thought, I love them so much, so why don’t they feel it? You’re doing everything you know to show your love, yet somehow, it’s just not landing. It’s a frustrating feeling, isn’t it? But here’s the thing—your partner probably feels the same way about you.
Let’s talk about this, because it’s one of those things that’s so common in relationships but rarely discussed.
What We Don’t Say Speaks the Loudest
Here’s a truth I’ve learned (the hard way, mind you): love isn’t just about what you feel; it’s about what you communicate. And sometimes, the way we communicate doesn’t match what our partner needs.
Think about it: your partner might say everything’s fine, but their tone or body language might hint otherwise. Maybe they’ve mentioned little things they wish you’d do, but you didn’t realize how important those things were to them.
This isn’t about blame—it’s about awareness. Because most of us aren’t mind readers (if you are, lucky you!). Instead, we’re all just trying to do the best we can with the tools we have.
Listening Without Words
You don’t need a long, deep conversation to start understanding your partner better. Sometimes, the clues are in the things they don’t say.
- Complaints can be insights. For example, “You’re always on your phone” might really mean, “I miss connecting with you.”
- Actions speak volumes. Does your partner love to leave little notes for you or plan special dinners? Maybe they’re showing you how they’d like to be loved in return.
- Reactions tell a story. Notice when they light up. Was it when you complimented them? When you offered to help with a task? Those moments matter.
And here’s a secret: just by being curious and paying attention, you’re already halfway there.
Assumptions Are Tricky Things
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve thought I was hitting the mark with someone I cared about—only to find out I wasn’t even close. You ever been there?
It’s easy to assume our partner needs the same things we do. If you love gifts, you might assume they’ll feel the same way when you surprise them with something. But what if they value quality time more? What if they’d trade every gift for one evening of undivided attention?
The truth is, we all love differently. And that’s not a bad thing. It just means we need to slow down and ask:
- “What makes you feel really loved?”
- “What’s something I’ve done that made you feel special?”
- “Is there something you wish I understood about you?”
These questions aren’t meant to be heavy or intimidating. They’re invitations to connect.
Have You Heard of Love Languages?
If you haven’t, let me introduce you. They’re kind of a game changer. Love languages are basically the ways we give and receive love, and they fall into five categories:
- Words of Affirmation: Compliments, encouragement, and loving words.
- Acts of Service: Doing thoughtful things like cooking dinner or folding the laundry.
- Receiving Gifts: It’s not about the cost—it’s about the thought behind the gift.
- Quality Time: Spending focused, intentional time together.
- Physical Touch: Hugs, hand-holding, kisses, and cuddles.
Understanding your partner’s love language can make all the difference. And it’s actually kind of fun to figure it out together.
A Safe Place to Reconnect
Now, let’s get personal for a second. Relationships thrive when both people feel seen and valued, right? But sometimes, life gets in the way. Work, kids, routines—they all pull our attention in a million directions.
That’s where a Soul Speak Session comes in. These sessions aren’t just about taking photos (though, trust me, the photos will be stunning). They’re about creating a moment to pause, to reflect, and to reconnect with the person you love most.
Imagine sitting across from your partner, sharing a quiet moment where the world melts away, and it’s just the two of you. That’s the kind of magic we create.
So, What Now?
Let’s keep this simple. Take a moment tonight—maybe over dinner, maybe while you’re winding down—and ask your partner, “What’s something small I can do to make you feel loved this week?”
It’s a small question, but it can open the door to so much more. And if you’re ready to take it even further, I’d love to help you create a moment you’ll treasure forever with a Soul Speak Session.
Stay tuned for Part 3, where we’ll talk about breaking down the barriers that keep us from expressing love fully. It’s going to get real, but in the best way.
